Have you been fantasizing about spicing up your sex life?
Today, 44 percent of married couples report feeling dissatisfied in their sex life. Work has been hectic, your newborn isn’t sleeping and the new season of Grace and Frankie just premiered on Netflix.
Hey, we get it.
Life gets busy and finding time to enjoy one another’s company in the bedroom isn’t always in the cards. The next thing we know, our sex life has taken a back seat and you realize it’s been nearly two months since you were last intimate.
If you’re ready to jump back in the saddle but you’re in need of some encouragement, this one’s for you. We’re uncovering seven simple and efficient tips on how to spice up your love making.
Whether you’ve been married for three days or thirty years, you’re bound to learn a thing or two below. It’s time to reignite the fires!
Table of Contents
1. Find a Time That Works for You
One of the best ways to spice up your sex life is to rid yourself of the notion that sex needs to take place before bed.
For most people, scheduling sex to take place before bedtime is only setting yourself up for failure. When we crawl into bed after a long day, the art of foreplay doesn’t always sound appealing. Instead, we find ourselves playing on our phone or succumbing to mind-numbing television.
This is why getting creative in your sex schedule is so important. Try setting your alarm early and having sex before you begin your morning routine. Or, arrange to have lunch at home and settle for a quickie instead.
Finding a time that works best for your schedule is going to allow sex to feel like less of a burden. Instead, you’ll find yourself enjoying sex and even looking forward to it.
2. Try Your Hand at Role-Playing
If you’re really looking to spice up your bedroom routine, why not consider role-playing?
Of course, it’s only natural to find role-playing intimidating at first. After all, the mere thought of pretending to be someone entirely different can feel alarming and even humiliating to some.
But, it’s important to remind yourself that there are countless different versions and even levels of role-playing.
After all, role-playing doesn’t have to be limited to as of the usual stereotypes. Too often, role-playing involves the role of a teacher and a student. Another common role-playing fantasy is a nurse and a patient.
In order to make role-playing more realistic, why not expand your mind to the lesser-known possibilities. In this sense, forget all of the career-driven role-play scenarios.
Instead, focus on different role-playing scenarios that work for you. For example, you may seek to recreate the intimacies that you first experienced upon meeting one another. Or, you may imagine that you are strangers meeting for the first time.
Not only is this type of sexual act fun and exciting, but it also helps to deepen your trust with one another. After all, role-playing involves putting a level of trust into one another and allowing yourselves to step away from your usual personas.
3. Practice the Art of Sexting
We all know how many messages we sent back and forth on a daily basis.
In most marriages, it’s passing on critical information throughout the day: how your meetings went, what the kids are up to or what to pick up on the way home for dinner.
But, what if we all took a little more time to communicate about the non-essentials?
The simple act of “sexting” can be the perfect way to establish intimacy throughout your day with one another. It could be as simple as recounting something from your last sexual experience or sharing a fantasy.
This gives both parties a sexual experience to think about throughout the day. By the time both parties are home, it’ll be a race to get dinner on the table and then find yourselves in the bedroom.
4. Say Hello to a Third Party
Have you ever considered spicing up your bedroom performance with a third party?
Remember, a third party doesn’t have to be a person. If introducing a third person into your sex life doesn’t appeal to you, there are plenty of other options for welcoming a third member.
That’s right, we’re talking about sex toys!
In this day and age, there’s certainly no shortage of vibrant and creative sex toys on the market. When it comes to choosing the right toy for yourself and your partner, it’s safe to say that there’s something for everyone.
If you’re new to the world of sex toys, fear not. Try starting with a toy such as the rabbits for blended orgasms. This is a simple-to-use toy that has been highly regarded for female pleasure.
5. Watch Porn Together
Whoever said that watching porn is something that must be hidden from your partner?
In today’s day and age, watching porn has become relatively commonplace. In fact, over 40 million Americans report visiting a porn site on a routine basis. When we consider such a number, it’s hard to imagine why porn viewership between couples is generally secretive.
If both parties enjoy porn, why not band together and enjoy your viewership mutually?
It’s safe to assume that watching porn is a fast and effective way to stimulate one’s libido. For those struggling to discover their sex drive, this is an excellent means of bettering and increasing your sexual appetite.
Nowadays, enjoying porn doesn’t have to mean watching classical porn. In fact, an entirely new wave of porn is now being showcased to appeal more to women and couples in particular.
For example, listening to porn rather than watching porn has become incredibly popular. This is the perfect channel for those that don’t enjoy traditional porn and feel more comfortable with an audio portrayal. Reading porn has also gained in popularity and is now widely available on the internet.
6. Consider Mutual Masturbation
Let’s be honest, sometimes finding time to have sex with your partner isn’t always realistic. It’s also possible that after a long day of work and tending to your family, the mere thought of having sex can feel exhausting.
Hey, we’ve all been there before.
This is why entertaining a more simplistic concept such as mutual masturbation has become so popular with couples today. As with the concept of a “quickie”, mutual masturbation is less time-consuming and less taxing than foreplay and sex.
Mutual masturbation is, well, exactly what it sounds like. Each partner stimulates themselves in the company of one another. Not only can be this can an incredibly intimate act, but it’s a simple way to bring both partners together sexually.
This is also a great way for partners to get to know one another’s body. In seeing what the other person likes, each partner can learn about what stimulation works best for their partner.
Pro tip: mutual masturbation doesn’t have to involve being physically present with one another. Fortunately, smartphone technology allows couples to get more creative and intimate with the concept of mutual masturbation.
This is perfect for couples that are separated by long-distance or a differing schedule.
7. Break out the Oils
Let’s be honest, the notion of having sex after a long day can feel like a full-time job.
After a hectic day at work, the thought of undressing one another and taking to the bedroom isn’t always easy. Instead, it’s only natural to find yourself on the couch catching up with your favorite reality show.
But, what if there was another way to relax?
The art of massage is a simple way to relax your partner and encourage intimacy. The intimate and gentle touching can often lead to kissing and more intimate touching. Once both parties feel both relaxed and physically connected, the thought of having sex feels all the more natural and enticing.
How to Spice Up Your Love Making
When you really stop and think about it, could your sex life use some help?
Sex therapists consider couples having sex less than ten times per year to be in a “sexless” marriage. If you’re nodding your head, you know firsthand that your bedroom performance could use a helping hand.
The good news is that learning how to spice up your love making doesn’t have to be so complicated. In fact, doing so can be as simple as experimenting with alternate sexual acts such as mutual masturbation or even role-playing.
Not only will this deepen your sexual connection with your partner, but you’re bound to increase your happiness and better your relationship. Just like that, you’re going to find yourself feeling more connected to your partner in no time.
Go on, now is your time to reignite the spark!
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